Imagine you’re backstage, heart pounding, palms sweaty. You’ve rehearsed your piece a thousand times, yet that familiar whisper creeps in: “What if you mess up? You’re not ready.” This is your Inner Critic—the voice that questions your worth, your skills, your very right to be here. But what if you could gently hush that voice…simply by turning inward and offering yourself pure, uncompromised self- love?
That little voice inside can feel protective—after all, it’s trying to keep you “safe” by warning you of mistakes. But more often than not, it spirals into self doubt, perfectionism, and paralysis. When you catch yourself saying, “I’m not good enough,” recognize it as the Inner Critic, not the true you.
Before a recent dance performance, I felt that same familiar tug of fear: “You don’t know the music well enough. You don't know what you're going to do.” My heartbeat thundered so loudly I thought the audience might hear it. I pressed my hands to my heart and womb space, inhaled deeply, and whispered: “I am enough, I know enough, and I do this for me.” Immediately, the tension softened, and I stepped into the spotlight with renewed confidence.
It's time to turn towards Self-Love. Self love isn’t selfish—it’s the foundation for silencing self criticism. Here’s how you can invite it in:
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Anchor in Kindness
When the Inner Critic brings up a past mistake, pause. Place your hands on your heart (or wherever feels nurturing) and speak to yourself as you would to a dear friend:“I forgive you. You did your best then, and you’re growing every day.”
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Speak Your Truth
Create short, powerful affirmations that resonate. Yours might be:“I am enough, I know enough, and I do this for me.”
Repeat them aloud whenever self doubt arises. -
Visualize Support
Imagine a wise mentor—real or imagined—sitting beside you, offering encouragement. What would they say? Let that loving counsel replace the harsh critique. I have had many clients tell me that they envision me sitting on their shoulder, whispering in their ears!
I also love to use small daily rituals that can help tend to that Inner Garden. Self love flourishes with consistent care. Try weaving these rituals into your days:
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Morning Mirror Check In
Look into your eyes and acknowledge one thing you appreciate about yourself: your resilience, your laugh, your creative spark. See yourself through your Goddess eyes (the eyes of Love). -
Gratitude Journaling
Each evening, jot down three moments where you felt proud or joyful. This re trains your mind to notice success. And of course, we all know that the more we appreciate, the more we see to appreciate! -
Gentle Movement
Whether it’s conscious dance, yoga, or a stroll, feel your body’s wisdom. Thank it for carrying you and for every small victory. When you move, you get out of your head and into your body. -
Breath Centered Breaks
Every few hours, pause for three deep, slow breaths. Place your hands on your heart and let love flow inward.
A dear friend once told me she felt unworthy of celebration after closing a big sale—she downplayed her achievement. Now, she lights a candle and toasts herself with a beverage of choice (herbal tea, glass of wine) honoring each win, no matter how small. This simple ritual transformed her relationship with success.
Now, let's transform that critique into self-compassion! Silencing the Inner Critic doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a tender unfolding. Begin by just noticing without judgment. When you catch the self-critical thought, say something like: “Ah, there's my Inner Critic again,” and let it pass like a cloud. The very first mentor I ever worked with privately gave me a finger puppet to represent my Inner Critic. I named her Beatrix so I tend to say “thanks Beatrix but I've got this!”
You may choose to offer a loving rebuttal when your Inner Critic pipes up. For every “You can't”, you can choose to respond with “But I can try” or “My worth isn't tied to performance or being perfect!”
Each time that you consciously call out your Inner Critic, celebrate! Every time you replace a harsh thought with a loving one, acknowledge your growth. You are rewiring your brain – creating neural pathways toward kindness.
Your Inner Critic may linger, but it need not dominate. Each time you place your hands on your heart, breathe, and affirm, you seed a new narrative: one of compassion, empowerment, and self trust.
Call to Action
My mentor's request is that you do more than just read. I challenge you to use these tips to embody the knowing!
I invite you to try this now: Close your eyes. Breathe in a moment of calm. Place your hands over your heart and womb space. Whisper, “I am enough.” Feel how the tension softens.
As you embrace these practices, remember: you’re cultivating a lifelong friendship with yourself. And in that friendship lies a wellspring of confidence and joy—far more powerful than any critic’s whisper.
Here’s to loving yourself—today, and every day!
As always, I would love to hear what this holds for you so feel free to share your thoughts with me by
Until Next Time....