I am asked all the time about the name of my business and why didn’t I name my business in a way that clearly defines what I do.  After all, that’s what all the “gurus” say…the name of your business should be memorable and clearly relay what you do.  And while my business name may not communicate to you what I do, it certainly is memorable and does provoke the question:  “Why Avalonian Moon?”  I realized that I haven’t shared the story behind this name with many of you.  There are a few that know the story but the majority of you do not so I thought it was about time I shared the story of Avalonian Moon.

As you know when my husband passed, I was on a quest for answers that had me going down a predominantly metaphysical/spiritual path.  That first Thanksgiving, my family and I travelled upstate to visit with my in-laws.  On the way home, there was a full moon and when we stopped at a rest stop, I looked up at the moon and did a double take because I thought I saw Brad’s face in the moon.  I called my oldest daughter over and asked her to look at the moon and tell me what she saw.  She saw his face as well.  I had my mother look but she didn’t see it.  Ever since then, I always see Brad’s face in the moon.....and it doesn’t have to be full for me to see his face either.  I find that to be a great comfort to me, even now, as it further cements for me that inner knowing that he is always with me, watching over me and all of us.  This is why the moon has significance for me.

One evening, I was in a spiritual chat room…chatting with my medium friends and one began doing a spontaneous reading for me.  In this reading, she saw that Brad and I shared a past life together during the time of King Arthur and Merlin.  We were both priestesses under Merlin in Avalon.  Well, I had never heard of Avalon but just prior to being in the chat room that night, I had a vision while meditating of this castle.  It wasn’t any castle that I recognized and I didn’t understand why I was seeing it.  As my friend continued to share more information, I opened another window and began searching Avalon.  Lo and behold, the first link I clicked on had a picture of the very castle I saw in my meditation earlier!  I cannot even begin to describe the chills that overtook my being as I gazed at that image.  I just knew in my heart of hearts that what the medium was sharing with me was absolutely correct and that Brad had showed me the castle in meditation so I would know the information was genuine.  What is interesting about all this is that Brad and I always felt drawn to the King Arthur, Excalibur, Camelot stories and now I knew why.

When I first thought of a healing business, I wanted to choose a name that had significance to me…that held meaning for me.  While in the shower, I heard “Avalon Moon” and I just smiled.  I knew that was the name but when I began searching that name, I discovered another NY company incorporated the name.  I was heartbroken.  How could Spirit give me a name that I could not use?  “Try Avalonian Moon” is what I heard next.  I was pleased to learn that it was available and thus Avalonian Moon was born. While it doesn’t convey the work I do, it holds special meaning for me and in my world, that’s what matters!

I suppose one could say the moral of this story is that we don’t have to follow the path that others have laid before us.  Just because we’re told “this is the way it’s done” doesn’t mean we have to do things the same way.  Perhaps what’s more important is the meaning behind what we do and why we do it and just perhaps, the “right” way is the most meaningful way for us individually.  So, my coach’s challenge to you is this:  What are you doing that is simply because it’s what you were told you should do?  Is there something else you could do that would hold more meaning for you?  Would doing what would be more meaningful to you cause harm to you or others?  Would doing it bring you more joy?  Something to ponder eh?

While we are actively grieving, there is a tendency to surround ourselves with people whom are also suffering.  We seek support from others that are going through the same or similar issues which is a normal course of behavior.  However, by isolating ourselves from the “outside” world, we are cutting ourselves off from life itself and we did not choose to have this physical experience to sit on the sidelines and observe.  We came to create and experience our creations and that is precisely what our spouses want for us…to continue to live, create, experience and be joyful in the process.

So, how do you go about engaging in life again when your heart is still so heavy?  You do so a little bit at a time.  You put a “toe in the water”, so to speak.  You start small, taking steps that you are comfortable and ready to take, and gradually increase your efforts as you gain momentum.  Start by going out for coffee with a friend or two.  Going out for coffee is a short time commitment and a good way to gauge what you’re ready to experience.  Next, you may choose to go for a meal or a movie.  The purpose here is to get you back out with people that are not grieving. 

Is there a particular activity you enjoy?  Try taking a class in that activity.  You get to do something you enjoy and you’re socializing with others who are not grieving.  You may even make a new friend or two!  Not necessarily ready to be around people yet?  No problem!  Take a walk out in nature.  Observe the surroundings and marvel at the abundance all around you.  Breathe in deeply and let the energy that is Life fill your lungs and heal your body…and heart.  The first time out is always the most difficult but as you take these little steps, the next get easier to take and before you know it, you are engaging in life again!

In my last blog post, I discussed the A in my Grieve with EASE™ program.  This month, I would like to discuss the S which represents the title of this article.

I know I’ve spoken about the importance of self-care before but it bears repeating as taking care of ourselves and putting ourselves first is something we continuously need to be reminded of.  It is so easy in today’s demanding world to put the needs of others above our own.  In many ways, it’s what we’re raised to do and to put ourselves first is to be selfish and that carries with it a negative connotation.  However, I wish to put forth to you that there’s a vast difference between being selfish and being self-absorbed.  Being self-absorbed means being so grossly narcissistic that the needs of others never occurs to you and you don’t give a damn about who you may hurt along the way to getting what you want and need.  Being selfish, on the other hand, means putting your own needs first, enabling you to be of better service to those that need you. It’s not that you’re ignoring the needs of others, but you’re nurturing yourself first.  In taking care of yourself and tending to your own needs, you’re in a better state of wholeness which enables you to tend to the needs of others more fully and with love.  This ideology holds true when you’re grieving as well.  You need to be gentle with yourself, doing what you feel you need to do when you feel you need to do it.  While I understand, from a personal perspective, that others are grieving as well and you want to be strong for them, it doesn’t serve them in the long run to neglect your own needs in the process.  Taking time for your own self-care while grieving is essential to the healing process….for all those you serve as well as yourself.

Spirit Connection is the other part of this program and entails recognizing the truth that we are all spiritual beings having a human experience and when that human experience is concluded, we return to our spiritual essence.  We do not die; we simply have a new and different focal point.  Instead of being physically focused, we become non-physically focused and have a much broader perspective than our 3D world allows.  In fact, even when we’re physically focused, there is still a part of us that remains non-physically focused.  We tend to refer to that part of ourselves as our Inner Being or Higher Self.  If there’s a desire to maintain a connection between the physical and non-physical, we need to learn how to communicate.  One of the ways we learn to communicate with spirit is to meditate.  When we quiet our mind, we are more able to hear the subtle ways in which spirit chooses to speak to us.  We learn to trust the information we receive in the way we receive it. So we are able to maintain a relationship with those that have passed but in a different way than we did when they were physical beings.  They have become our angels and they guide us in subtle ways and we can hear them if we choose to listen.